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11/19/2019 0 Comments Our hearts are wired for love Thoughts from Bob Goff's #LiveInGraceWalkInLove day 323
Today, Goff talks about how Jesus had this radical approach to love that was often contrary to how some of the religious leaders and even his followers thought he should love. Goff shares the story of how Jesus healed a man in the temple on the sabbath - doing anything on the sabbath was frowned upon then. He asked the religious leaders if it was better to do good or evil on the sabbath, to save life or kill it. The religious leaders left and started plotting how to kill Jesus. I think too often I have an analytical love. I often recognize people who are hurting, but too often I analyze what loving them will look like to others. What will people think of my beliefs and my faith if I love this person. What will people think of my status in life if they see me hanging out with this person. I like to believe we all pretty much have hearts wired for love. I think we long to be loved - I think we long to love others. But I think we also have minds that are really good at talking us out of loving people. A love radar goes bonkers in our heart, our mind starts slowing us down and telling us all the reasons loving someone is a bad or risky idea. I had a situation with a friend yesterday that reminded me how far down the road of unloving our minds can take us. I was reminded if we'd just listen to our hearts, love becomes a foregone conclusion. Love was always a foregone conclusion for Jesus. He allowed his mind to ask him one question - is this person hurting. If the answer was yes, he loved them. If the answer was no - he moved on. The cool thing about Jesus - he recognized that we are all hurting.
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 Thoughts from Bob Goff's #LiveInGraceWalkInLove day 316
Today, Goff talks about the reality that having strong faith doesn't always mean life feels good. That's one of the toughest parts of my Christian faith to grasp - this idea that sometimes when life doesn't feel good God is hardest at work in my life. I think that's because the world we live in is pretty much built on the prospect of feeling good. We want relationships that feel good, a job that makes us feel good, hobbies and pursuits that lead to feeling good. The struggle is the definition of good is constantly changing. What felt good yesterday doesn't feel quite so good today. I can find myself building up a tolerance toward worldly good; I constantly need more good to feel good. Kind of like a drug. The other challenge is so much of what we see as good is based on what good looks like in someone else's life. Good is a relative thing. But God promises He's going to make ALL things good. Even when life feels like it's downright awful - something good is going on. That's so counter-world. It's a radical definition of good - this idea that all things are good. I frequently look at life through the lens of running. Mainly because it's such a great teacher and parallel to life. Last year I ran the Land Between the Lakes 60K in Kentucky. It rained hard. Thunder clapped and lighting struck all around us. The trail was muddy and each step was harder to get any kind of footing. In addition, I was trying to run further than I ever had. So much of that race was a challenge. When it was over - more than 12 hours later - I was nauseous. For the longest time I sat in my hotel room bent over a trash can wanting to die. I would have never said then what I'll say now: that race was awesome. It was so good!! I think that's the other challenge with our relationship to good. We're not patient about it. We want a relationship that produces right here and right now - we want this present moment in life to feel good. When it doesn't, when we feel ill, when life feels like it's falling apart, it's hard to buy into the truth that the promise of good IS the good in that moment. Nothing seems more dismissive of our current pain than the idea someone sees good in it. I can look back on enough pain in my life, all of which has turned to some kind of good, to know it's not dismissive at all. Hard? Yes. Dismissive? No. The good is found in the promise. Or more - in the promiser. 11/10/2019 0 Comments How Do I love the people who hurt me? Thoughts from Bob Goff's #LiveInGraceWalkInLove day 314
Today Goff offers this thought, and maybe a challenge - he says "Love doesn't dishonor others; it finds a way to lift them up even when they actively push you down." I'm sure that's the most radical request - command - of my Christian faith. How do I love people who hurt me, who take advantage of me or push me down or treat me mean - all the things people sometimes do in our lives that make them difficult to love? More and more, I lean on Jesus' dying words on the cross to try to answer that. As the leaders who were crucifying Him laughed and sneered at Him, and drew straws to see who got his clothing - Jesus said this, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." For the past several years, I've been doing a lot of work around adversity - especially childhood adversity - and how it impacts people. How it can literally change their minds and their bodies. It can change who they are. I can speak about this for hours to audiences, but the one thing I always ask them to take away from it - the one simple request I make of every audience, no matter who they are, is this: When people interact with you in a way that's aggravating you or hurting you or making you feel uncomfortable in a whole host of possible ways, I ask you to consider if that person might have some deeper story in their life that's shaping the way they are acting right now. That's hard. At least for me. Because my human mind can have a hard time letting people get away with how they are treating me. It often wants to get even with them, make them feel as bad about what they are doing to me as having it done to me feels in the moment. My human mind can drift toward hate and not love. Jesus realized these folks all had deeper stories in their lives that were shaping how they were treating him. He wasn't excusing them for what they were doing, he was simply looking for a way to love them in spite of it. There's an old saying that suggests the most unlovable people are usually the people who need it most. I believe that more every day. Because the broken and hurting stories people have buried in them, stories that have reshaped who they are, they are usually stories of how they were wronged, how they were un-loved or mis-loved. Stories that have left them longing for love, but with no idea how to ask for it or receive it - or even knowing what that looks like. And many times, the ways they try to get it from us and others, is not very lovable. So it's up to us to try to understand "they know not what they are doing." It's up to us to show them what love really looks like. Doing so - believe me - is the hardest part of my faith. But it's likely the part that counts the most. In my life, and in someone else's.  Thoughts from Bob Goff's #LiveInGraceWalkInLove day 313
Today, Goff is talking about gratitude. I don't think it's unrelated to yesterday's talk about joy. Like joy, gratitude isn't always a natural feeling or emotion that sweeps over us when life is good. Sometimes, we are challenged to look deep into our 'life ain't so good' moments and find something to be grateful for in spite of feeling like there's little to give thanks for. I have to tell you. It's been a challenging week for me on many fronts. But yesterday was Friday - the week was finally coming to an end - I make that Friday traffic-filled trip up 95 from downtown and the week would be over. Hello weekend! I safely made it through the accidents and weekend travelers and pulled into my driveway. I reached into my back seat where I always toss my backpack at the end of the day - and it wasn't there. In my mind going in a million different directions yesterday, I left work without it. The first time ever. I keep my life in that backpack. My computer. My books I'm reading. Stuff I needed to prepare for a work conference next week. It wasn't an option, I had to make the trip back downtown and back home again. You talk about what felt like the worst possible 'life ain't so good moment.' Trust me, I know people have worse life ain't so good going on in their lives - but in the moment, mine felt disastrous. As I headed back down the road, I decided to crank up my Christian music and try to drown the rest of the world out. Before I knew it, I was singing along, even though I absolutely had no desire to be singing. One day before I read this morning's scripture - I will praise God's name in song and glorify him with thanksgiving - I was doing just that for all the I-95 weekend travelers to witness. I suddenly felt God's presence. And with that, I suddenly realized there is always something to be grateful for. You know, I'm really guilty sometimes of waiting for God to change my situation before I'm grateful to him. My gratitude comes with an if-then clause. But yesterday, I discovered what David discovered centuries ago when he wrote many of the Psalms like this morning's. David discovered gratitude isn't about what God does with our situations. Instead, it's no matter what the situation is, God is always there with us and for us and and watching over us whether our situation feels like he is or not. I made it back downtown. I got my backpack and began the trip back home. The traffic was worse than ever - the accidents more plentiful - so I just sang. I just sang a little louder - and probably worse than ever . |