But God....

​There was a time when I wasn't a big fan of the book of Genesis in the bible. But today, it's one of my favorite books. I think because the book is full of messed up lives that God finds a way to use for meaningful purposes.

The story of Joseph is one of those stories. Granted, Joseph had a lot of help getting to messed up - especially from his brothers. But like many Genesis stories - like MANY stories about you and me - Joseph showed us God often likes to use our messes more than our perfections to accomplish his plan.

When Joseph was a kid, he pissed his older brothers off. (Telling your older siblings you've been having dreams about them one day bowing before you will do that.) So his brothers sell Joseph into slavery. Which eventually leads him to prison. Which then, through a crazy series of events, lands him decades later as the second in charge of all of Egypt.

In that role, Joseph finds himself in a position of being able to help his brothers survive an awful famine. Or - he could let them starve and get revenge for what they'd done to him when he was a kid.

When given that opportunity, Joseph told his brothers in Genesis 50:20: "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives."

For too long, I've been stuck in the middle of that decision. Do I go with 'you intended to harm me' OR 'but God'?

Do I keep wrestling with my mess, or do I choose to move on to what God is wanting to do with my mess?

Steven Furtick says, "Everything God wants to do next in your life is connected to what he's calling you to do now." There are many days I think I want God to just go ahead and take care of the right now for me and teleport me into what's next.

If you read Genesis enough times, though, you'll discover that's not how God works. God has plans for the messes we're trying to circumvent to get to what we think should be next.

Too often, while we're wresting with the harm - whether it's harm someone did to us or we brought on to us or the world dropped down on us - while we're wrestling with the harm, God is patiently waiting for us to say "but God....."

I'm reminded this week of how that is ultimately a daily choice. A daily opportunity.

But me OR but God?

But when is this going to end OR but what purpose is God weaving out of this?

But my struggle OR but God's solution?

Buts rarely work out for me. I often use buts to introduce my excuses for staying in the hurt.

But... maybe but could be the way for me to introduce God to my excuses.

But God.. maybe that's the difference between hiding from a calling and answering it.