faith sees the power of today without knowing tomorrow

​Faith is easy when the things we want to materialize from our faith always materialize - and with a timing that allows us to live life feeling good and comfortable and safe.

That's not how faith always works, though. There have been days lately when I've wondered if that's how faith EVER works.

I've found myself asking God a simple one-word question lately.

When?

And God keeps responding with his own one-word answer.

Faith.

Knowing the outcomes in life. Knowing their timing. Knowing when the holes we have in our hearts and the plans in our mind and the dreams in our soul - knowing when and how all of those things will come to be - all of that knowing is a very human desire.

Accepting that we don't get to know, believing that God already knows and that's enough, finding strength in the mystery and not in the answers - all of that is a very Godly desire.

Our human desires are to create and discover and assign truth. We want to live in absolute predictability.

God's desire is mystery. His desire is that we turn lovingly and longingly to him in unpredictability.

That creates quite the conflict some days - at least from the standpoint of my faith. It creates tension when I become obsessed with 'when' while God is obsessed with 'how'.

It creates struggle when I'm fixated on the final chapter - happily ever after - while God seemingly isn't giving so much as a glance to those final pages.

Because the reality is, God is obsessed with the page I'm on.

Today.

God is obsessed with me discovering I'll never be happy with 'the end' if I can't find joy in the words He and I will write today.

God wants me to believe that today is the most meaningful day I've had in my life. He wants me to believe that without having to skip ahead to the final pages of my life to see proof of it.

Faith is living today like I already know it.

Most days I do, God. But not every day....