Life is a we thing

Before the start of the Megsmiles 5K yesterday, my friend Maria caught this picture of me taking a selfie with my dear friend Kelly Jarvis Anderson.

Over the last several years, I've said it a lot - I have presented and taught on it a lot - I've said, life is a we thing.

At the heart of that message is the truth that we are neurobiologically wired to be our healthiest selves in the middle of we. And, maybe not so disconnected - if at all - we are most content in the middle of we.

Relationships are the greatest protective factor we have over every unhealthy risk we might encounter in life.

I confess, I have not always understood that. I've certainly not been good at it. I have spent a lot of my life avoiding we and not embracing it. I have spent a lot of my life feeling threatened by we and not the least bit open or curious about what lies in the depths of it.

Because we thing is much more about depths than heights. It's much more about a longing to hold what you might find on the inside than it is about liking what you see on the outside.

Kelly is one of the people who helped open my eyes to we thing. She always moves right on by the ornaments hanging on my outside and says tell me about what's happening on the inside.

It was a gift yesterday for Elliott and I (because Ian got tired of our pace and ran on 🤷‍♂️) to walk with Kelly and her friend Renee (I love her expression in the selfie shot 😊) the final mile of the race.

They talked about how they met 30 years ago as young teachers in rural Hanover County. And now, even though they live in two different states, they have remained best of friends. Their families have become each other's extended families.

I found myself envious of that in many ways. But more than that, I found myself grateful to be in the middle of that conversation. I found myself grateful that my sixteen year old was right there with me listening in to the power of we. The joy to be found in it.

I found myself believing we are almost always - if not always - in the right place at the right time.

I found myself more committed than ever to this message: life is a we thing.

I long for we, and I long to spread the gospel of we.

Jesus once said, life boils down to this: love God, love one another. That often gets preached as a command. I believe if I was sitting with Jesus it would feel more like an invitation. I believe I'd feel Jesus longing to know what's on my inside while totally ignoring how put together I was trying to look on the outside.

Jesus is a fan of Christmas I think; Christmas ornaments - not so much.

I believe that because of my friend Kelly. I believe that because of the people who have come alongside me in some dark times and been curious about my darkness. And then, upon discovering it, sat there in it with me for a bit without feeling pressured to turn all the lights on.

Because that is we thing. Meeting people where they are no matter where you are.

Life is a we thing.

I saw a lot of runners yesterday, but few were racing for the prize. Most seemed to be racing for togetherness. And more than any medal we can hang on a wall, togetherness is what ultimately holds us all together.

Nothing is better for any of us than we.