Our Failure Stories are for Changing, not shaming.

​Failure is real. Maybe it's not an actual place or thing, but it's a real feeling.

We all have visions of who and where we think we should be in life. Many of us don't feel like we are that person; we don't feel like we're where that person should be.

We feel like we are coming up short.

We feel like a failure.

Failure may not be a real place or thing, but it is indeed a real feeling.

I walked for a few hours yesterday morning. In quiet time, those feelings of failure can come over me. In quiet time, who I want to be can take over my thoughts, along with the reality of just how far from being that person I really am.

I don't think those feelings of failure in and of themselves are unhealthy. But how I interpret them can be.

When I start letting those feelings dictate whether I see myself as good or bad, that's when failure becomes unhealthy. Because eventually you can truly start to believe you're a bad person simply because you are not who or where you want to be.

And eventually, a bad person gives up on working toward that person and place.

Yesterday, I was reminded that when we start asking ourselves - am I good or bad - we are asking a question that has already been answered.

When God reached his own hands into the dirt and crafted the first human, he stood back and said - ah, this is good. You ever wonder why it feels so good to build something with your own hands when you stand back and stare at it?

And before I ever came into this world, before I was even in the womb, God said - ah, this is good.

And God has made it clear over and over - I don't have a feeling of failure in me that can make him take that back. He is stuck on me. When he looks at me, he is stuck on - ah, this is good.

I don't think God is totally against our feelings of failure, however. I do think he's against us using them to call him a liar. He said we are good. How do we get to question him about that?

I think, though, God is for a different question in those feelings of failure. I think God is in those feelings of failure challenging us to ask ourselves - what do I need to change in my life?

Who and where I want to be aren't always unreasonable ideals. In fact - they are often the ideals that bring to life in us the areas where we do need to change. But when I use them to determine whether I am good or bad instead of whether or not the things I'm doing are getting me where I need to be - that's where the damage begins.

And yesterday, I was reminded that more often than not, the reason I stay stuck in places that aren't who and where I want to be, is because I'm busy scolding me for not being there instead of trusting the God who is always beside me saying, I'm ready when you are.

I'm ready to show you the way once you're done deciding whether or not your good enough to go there.

We all have failure stories. But the reality is, those stories aren't trying to shame us, those stories are trying to change us. Those stories aren't trying to imprison us, they are trying to set us free.

Our failure stories aren't for beating ourselves up, they are for God to show just how high he can lift us up.

God told me long ago that I am good. He's simply asking me to use my quiet time to trust that, and to allow him to show me just how good he truly believes I can be.