Our Stories All Deserve To Be Read Like Best Sellers

​I co-lead a three day training this week.

CHATS: Connecting Humans and Telling Stories.

At the heart of the training is the idea that we are healthiest when we share our stories with one another. The training helps teach us how to do that, since we aren't all great at it.

A young woman in the training said something that will stick with me. She said, "Everyone should feel the freedom to share their story like they are reading out loud a best seller."

It got me to thinking, I have many friends who read books and enthusiastically suggest: "You have GOT to read this one." But when it comes to our own story, we often become editors instead of storytellers.

There are many legitimate reasons for this.

Some of us hold back out of fear of judgment. We worry that if people knew the whole story, they might think less of us. We assume our mistakes are disqualifying rather that relatable. Yet, so many of the best sellers we encourage others to read are FULL of imperfect people!

Some of us hold back to look strong. We've spent years building an image of competence, success, independence - look at me, I have it all together. Our real stories often threaten that image because they reveal our humanity.

Often we feel like our story doesn't matter, so we don't read it to others. People often say, "Nothing that interesting has happened to me." This week, I witnessed countless people discovering that stories aren't powerful because extraordinary things happen, it's because ordinary people find great meaning in those things.

Another one, sometimes we don't read our stories out loud because we were taught NOT to. Don't air dirty laundry. Be strong. Nobody wants to hear about your problems. Those lessons may have protected us at some point in life, but they disconnect us from life today.

A reason close to my own story - sometimes we don't tell our stories because we fear hurting others. We don't hide them to protect ourselves, we hide them because we care about the people who may be characters in them. That tension can be hard to navigate.

And maybe the biggest one - I KNOW the biggest one I experienced this week. We forget, or have never learned, that vulnerability creates connection. We often assume vulnerability pushes people away, yet most meaningful relationships begin when someone risks honesty.

The moment someone says: "Can I tell you something I've never told many people?" The room usually gets quieter not louder.

People lean in.

And this makes me wonder.

Maybe it's when we make people feel like we want to hear their story like it's a best seller that people feel the freedom to finally share it like it's one.

We all have stories.

They are all potentially best sellers.

We simply need more readers excited to read them.

I am so full of gratitude for another great week of co-leading a training with dear friends and hanging out with some of the dearest humans once could hang out with - all of whom are on my best sellers list!!