Skip the step of forgiving and move on to loving

​This morning, Goff tells the story of how when his daughter was young he wrote letters to her covering all the bad things he could think of that might happen in the years ahead. Then he buried the letters in the front yard.

One day she wrecked his car. So he took her out in the front yard and together they dug up the note declaring he forgave her - a note he'd written a decade earlier.

That's a pretty radical approach to grace. Years in advance decide I'm forgiving someone for whatever they do.

I had a conversation with a friend about forgiveness yesterday. I told her I'd learned that forgiveness isn't about clearing the air about things or fixing things or even about two people agreeing on who was right or wrong. Forgiveness is a personal decision we make within ourselves to free up space to love.

Lack of forgiveness, a lack of grace - that eats up space that can love. Lots of it. I'm not sure anything robs us of our capacity to love more than a lack of forgiveness.

I love that when Goff's daughter wrecked the car he didn't even have to deal with analyzing the situation to decide whether he should forgive her or not - since he already had he could move full steam ahead with loving her.

He's not the first one to have that idea, you know. Jesus died on the cross to say from this point forward you're forgiven. I've already buried letters of grace in every front yard you'll ever live in. I don't have time to withhold grace from you when I could spend that time loving you.

What if we started with today.

At our family gatherings.
On the drive to those gatherings.
Friends who've wronged us.
Something the kids will say or do today.

What if today we skipped the step of figuring out if we should forgive them and move right on to loving them.

In the process of doing that - know - know beyond a doubt - through Christ we've already been offered that same gift.