There is no such thing as reassurance and peace of mind

​Sharing what I write used to be a scary deal for me. Because when I share what I write, or share anything I create or do, it's easy to start wondering what other people will think about it.

When I first started sharing my writing, I minimized the risk by writing things I knew a lot of people would approve of. Things that gave me the best chance of hearing them say "that's good" or "I really liked that".

You know what I discovered? As soon as I had a collection of people I knew liked what I was writing, I moved on to worrying about the people I knew didn't like it - or the people I didn't know if they did or not.

I started writing to a whole knew group for my reassurance.

Writing has taught me there is no such thing as reassurance. We are creatures who love seeking it out, but the moment we have a taste of reassurance, we find the next thing to be unsure of.

That's who we are.

Then one day I guess I decided the value in my writing came from being able to share my life, not from getting reassurance about it. Writing taught me there is much more to be gained in life by taking risks, not by trying to drive risk to zero.

I see so many people, and I've been there done that and still do, who spend so many hours of their day seeking the path of least risk and most reassurance. Their outcome, they get neither and they are living unfulfilled lives.

Before I hit the "post" button on this article, I'm going to ask myself, if someone gives me feedback about the article that is not reassuring, will I regret sharing it? If the answer is yes, I'm not hitting "post." Because being fulfilled by what I just wrote is suddenly dependent on reassurance.

I'll also ask myself, is there a risk in hitting the "post" button on this article. If the answer is no, I'm not hitting "post." Because I've discovered the writing that seems to impact other lives the most is the writing that feels risky - many days vulnerable - to share.

Maybe that's a good test for our lives, today. Is this next thing I'm going to do being done to feel reassured. If so, don't do it.

Is this next thing I'm going to do being do to feel like there is no risk in my life. If so, don't do it.

Because the most meaningful and fulfilling things in life are usually on the other side of going bravely forward into spaces where there is not reasurrance, and there is a whole boat load of risk.

I trust you all get my point here and won't go jumping out of airplanes without parachutes or driving 55 MPH down I-95 on the sheets of ice this morning.

Sometimes monitoring the risk is a good idea - it's just not the best way to monitor our lives.