Trust the process while knowing it may need fixed

​Sometimes we can trust the process all the way to our own demise.

I used to trust the process. At least that's what I'd tell myself I was doing.

This will all work out.

This too shall pass.

This is but a blip in time.

I suppose some of those chants helped me at times. But when you do more chanting than fixing, all chants quickly become unhelpful.

Today I know I used to spend far more time avoiding the process than fixing it. Fixing it and building a process I could TRULY come to trust.

Nowhere has this been truer of my life than in relationships.

Almost all relationships originate with emotions. Emotions that draw us in and make us feel like this relationship is a good idea. Sometimes a great idea. Maybe it is. But it won't be those feel good emotions that hold the relationship together; it will be processes.

Processes that help you know which emotions are helpful to the relationship, and which ones are bent on destroying it. Processes that help you build on the beautiful emotions, and at the same time find ways to navigate the emotions that are more sledge hammer than building blocks.

Because if you don't have THOSE processes, processes that navigate and fix the broken navigation, the sledge hammer will always win.

Always.

Processes are good. They are. Not because they ensure success, but because they help us identify where the process might be standing in the way of success more than it's pointing us there.

That requires us to know that trusting a process needs someone in it we can trust to say, this process needs fixing. This process that was once leading us somewhere is now dragging us down.

Many things start good.

Many things can grow from good into better.

But it will usually be because someone fixed the process along the way far more than they trusted it.

Maybe you have some processes in your life you've been trusting that might need fixed.

It's worth considering.