You must know yourself to trust yourself

​It's pretty easy to make decisions that impact people we don't know or love or have a trusting relationship with. There's seemingly little to be lost there. The decisions can feel relatively inconsequential.

I think the truth can be said of the decisions we make about our own lives as well. Maybe more true.

If I look back on my life and honestly analyze my decisions, I'd have to say I've been a pretty reckless decision-maker. I'm coming to realize that's in large part because I had no idea who the guy was that I was making decisions for.

When you don't know yourself - you can't possibly love yourself. You surely can't reasonably trust yourself. And so you start making decisions like you're drawing names out of a hat at the office Christmas party.

Random and without consideration.

Only in this case, almost all the selections turn out to be losers. They are destructive. And it's not like you're trying to BE destructive; it's just destruction becomes the greatest risk of making decisions for someone you do not know or love or trust.

Over the last several years I've gotten to know me better. Getting to know anyone is a process; getting to know yourself may be the hardest. But as a result, I've started to trust me and love me and desire to make healthier decisions for me.

I've discovered my faith is something I want to live and not just believe.

I've discovered relationships are something to embrace and not fear.

I've discovered that writing is a pathway to getting to know me and not hide me.

I've discovered that authentic is sometimes more painful than pretend, but always more worth it in the end.

Getting to know yourself is not easy. At least it hasn't been for me. But starting to count the reasons to love and trust yourself is a whole lot healthier than the daily practice of counting the reasons not to.

It's healthier to start making decisions that consider a real you that you love and trust. Not that the recklessness is all gone - but less reckless is such a great step in the right direction.

Every day is a series of decisions. The question is how much time do we spend trying to truly know the people we are making them for?

Making for ourselves and for others?

It's pretty easy to make decisions that impact people we don't know or love or have a trusting relationship with. But that is so risky.

We owe it to ourselves to make loving decisions. We owe that to others as well.